My grandmother died 11 years ago tomorrow. She was 94 years old, and she had outlived both of her children, her son-in-law, and all three of my other grandparents.
I’ve taken to calling that summer the summer of my discontent. My daughter broke her leg in spectacular fashion in July, my grandmother died in August, and I was stuck so deep in my feelings I couldn’t find a way out.
It wasn’t just the broken leg, though that was really truly spectacular, complete with two ambulances, a midnight drive up 95, an operating room, and a cast from the top of her thigh to the tip of her toe. And it wasn’t just the death of my grandmother, though that represented the end of an era, after losing my father, and then my aunt and uncle and my grandfather in fairly quick succession. It wasn’t even that the death of my grandmother left me, at the age of 42, as the eldest member of the family on that side of the tree.
Grief is funny. It can sneak up on you, and it can linger. And that summer it did both.
Time is funny, too. Because from this vantage point, 11 years on, what I remember is the broad brush - the adrenaline, the sadness, the discontent. And I remember feeling stuck, unable to find my way back to myself.
It was a hard time, yes. But it was also that sequence of events that prompted me to send the very first email to my friends with a list of good things from my day.
And although I wouldn’t wish that Summer of my discontent on anyone, I do acknowledge that it’s how we got to where we are today. So many of you reading, and sharing good things in the comments, and emailing me your lists, and practicing on your own and with your people. So many of us making the time and effort to Notice, Name + Share good things each day. Which is good for us, good for each other, good for the times we live in. Good for the world.
We create ripples with this practice. Each time we Notice, Name + Share, we shine a light on what’s good, we help others to see more of it, and we amplify the very notion of goodness in a world that so desperately needs it.
Thank you, friends. From the bottom of my heart, and in my Grama’s memory.
This is why we practice.
(Incidentally, if you’ve heard me tell this story before, it’s fitting. My grandmother repeated her stories over and over and over again, so it’s in her honor that I’m repeating this one today.)
Thursday:
Lucy made new pickles and they are SO GOOD. I love new pickles, and these are the best I’ve ever had. (How many can a person eat in one sitting? Asking for a friend.)
A day full of meetings left me feeling energized rather than depleted.
Ted Lasso is proof that we can repeat the things on our lists, because good things are good things are good things.
Now you? Tell me 3 good things?
Xo.
