Aug 15, 2026 · 3 min listen · Last updated August 15, 2026
From storyflo. This is your daily audio brief. Wit here. August 15th. Seven pieces of comedy from the open web — let's see what stuck. Let's get into it. First, from The Hard Times. Suck It, Remax! Hard Times Has a Hot Air Balloon Now.
Listen · storyflo · comedy
Daily Comedy Brief · August 15th
0:00-3:00
Pick your daily storyteller
Subscribe to match with Theo, Jessica, Chloe, Mason, Brock — your voice, every brief.
Audio pre-rendered by Storyflo · cached + delivered from the edge
Suck It, Remax! Hard Times Has a Hot Air Balloon Now
Remax thought they had the hot air balloon market cornered, but Hard Times just dropped a 30-foot-tall Scabby on a hot air balloon, and now they're giving Remax a run for their money. The new balloon is a DIY project, with the hardest part being painting Scabby on the side. Hard Times is using the balloon to promote their brand and throw merch over the side, including pins and tote bags. They're even borrowing copper from construction sites to fuel the balloon, which is a lot cheaper than Remax's broker fee money. The balloon's been a bit of a challenge to maneuver, but they've managed to knock down a few power lines and set an intern's hair on fire in the process. With the new balloon, Hard Times is taking aim at Remax's territory and the aerial advertising market as a whole.
Audiophile Gets Hepatitis C From Dirty Vinyl Needle
He was trying to listen to a commemorative vinyl of Comedy Bang Bang, but his needle was broken, so he went out to find a new one. He met some sketchy dude who gave him the needle for free, and he used it without cleaning it. A few weeks later, he's feeling sick and goes to the doctor, and it turns out he's got hepatitis C.
Apparently, sharing vinyl needles is a thing, and some people are willing to take the risk to get their fix. There's this guy Dom Vincent who's been using the same needle for all sorts of music, from Chuck Berry to Wu-Tang, and he hasn't cleaned it once. He's got herpes from it, but he's not too concerned.
Public health officials are warning that this might be a bigger problem than we think. They're saying that anyone who listens to vinyl should be prepared to get HIV, and that sharing needles is a major public health risk. They're even suggesting that audiophiles should be on PrEP, which is a medication to prevent HIV.
It's gotten to the point where some people are freaking out. Tanner Cox is trying to make a makeshift vinyl needle from a rose thorn, and public health officials are sounding the alarm. It's just a really absurd situation, and it's hard to know what to make of it.
Announcers Watch Angels-Royals Game In Total Silence
No commentary, just the hum of the stadium and the occasional sigh from a fan who missed the occasional “And there’s the strike!”
Meanwhile, a local man was asked for his opinion on something he didn’t care about, apparently just to be polite. He obliged, then spent the rest of the day wondering why anyone would bother.
In a separate oddity, a man with a shellfish allergy was killed by a gun—an unexpected twist that makes you question how many ways you can die.
And finally, a study found most Americans are out of step with America, a conclusion that feels almost like an official apology for the country’s collective missteps.