Sep 17, 2026 · 5 min listen · Last updated September 17, 2026
From storyflo. This is your daily audio brief. It's Wit. September 17th. Seven things made me laugh out loud at my desk; we'll start with the worst one. Let's get into it. First, from The Onion. Tyler Neiman. Tyler Neiman, a 29-year-old bowling enthusiast, is set to meet an untimely end during his commute home from league play.
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Daily Comedy Brief · September 17th
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Tyler Neiman
Tyler Neiman, a 29-year-old bowling enthusiast, is set to meet an untimely end during his commute home from league play. It’s a classic case of life being both mundane and absurd; one moment, he’s rolling strikes, and the next, he’s the subject of a posthumous reflection. The article captures that strange disconnect between the everyday and the inevitable, highlighting how someone can be so blissfully unaware of their fate, all while engaging in something as innocuous as bowling.
The humor lies in the juxtaposition of Tyler's ordinary life and the dark twist awaiting him. It’s a reminder that sometimes, life’s most routine moments can be laced with unexpected outcomes, leaving us to ponder the fragility of existence. Tyler may be oblivious now, but his impending absence will certainly leave a mark on those who knew him.
In the end, it’s a light-hearted yet poignant commentary on mortality, wrapped in the absurdity of a bowling league. It’s a nod to the unpredictability of life, where one’s greatest joy can quickly turn into a somber reflection.
Dad Races Outside To Witness Delivery Of Neighbor’s Mulch
In Greensboro, North Carolina, local dad Glenn Stevenson made quite the spectacle by dashing outside to catch the delivery of his neighbor’s mulch. As the dump truck rolled up, he couldn’t contain his excitement, declaring the arrival of what he estimated to be around 800 to 900 pounds of cherry brown mulch. With hands on his hips, he took in the scene like a connoisseur at a wine tasting, critiquing the quality and pondering the logistics of the whole operation.
Stevenson had a few thoughts about the mulch’s potential use, speculating it would likely head toward the hydrangeas, but he couldn’t help but wonder if there’d be enough left for the shrubs in the back. He even calculated the cost of the load, estimating a minimum of a hundred bucks a yard, not including delivery. It’s a classic case of neighborly mulch envy, where the excitement of yard work becomes a competitive sport.
Just when you thought the mulch drama was over, Stevenson’s attention was caught by another delivery across the street—a paving truck pouring hot asphalt. One can only imagine the thrill of watching that unfold, as if he were witnessing the Olympics of home improvement. Who knew mulch could spark such enthusiasm?
LAS VEGAS—Seemingly unbothered by his disgrace as he sauntered through the glass doors and onto the Las Vegas Strip, coward Kevin Lombardo reportedly left the Flamingo casino Friday even though he still had a full $200 in his wallet. “I sat there and actually watched that spineless piece of shit miss on his corner bet, gather up $200 in chips, and say, ‘Well, that’ll do it for tonight, boys and girls,’” said fellow roulette player Marty Chun, adding that it wasn’t even 11 p.m. and Lombardo still had the whole night to man up and put it all on the fucking line.
PONTE VEDRA BEACH, FL—In a dramatic reversal of decades of established organizational practice, the PGA Tour announced Wednesday that, effective immediately, golf would be loud. “After careful consideration, the board of directors and I agree that, going forward, the game of golf will be really, really loud instead of quiet like it used to be,” said PGA Tour CEO Brian Rolapp, describing plans to install emergency sirens and industrial gas turbines on all golf courses, encourage spectators in the gallery to use air horns and other noisemaking devices, and dispatch a roving polka band to all…
Thousands Of IDs Misprinted With Random Man’s Face
More than 8,000 people in Michigan received IDs with a photo of a random smiling man printed on them, with officials stressing the photo is a generic non-resident. What do you think? “Nobody in Michigan would be smiling in their driver’s license.” Elroy Schaefer, Bean Sheller “I just assumed everyone had to be a generic man now.” Lakisha Hickman, Veterinary Consultant “That guy’s on the hook to donate a lot of organs.” Pablo Arroyo, Bike Welder The post Thousands Of IDs Misprinted With Random Man’s Face appeared first on The Onion.
Rumpelstiltskin Isn’t Your Typical Fertility Startup
For some, having a baby can be prohibitively expensive, but the cost of living shouldn’t mean that starting a family is just a fairy tale. That’s where Rumpelstiltskin comes in. Rumpelstiltskin isn’t your typical fertility startup. Rumpelstiltskin is here for your child. Our founders took years of experience in casino design and timeshare sales and swaddled them together into a first-of-its-kind solution that asks: Do poor people deserve to have kids? The business is revolutionary, but the concept isn’t.