Oct 16, 2026 · 3 min listen · Last updated October 16, 2026
From storyflo. This is your daily audio brief. Wit, October 16th. Seven from the writers' rooms and the open mics — here's the one I keep thinking about. Let's get into it. First, from McSweeney's Internet Tendency. Tarot Cards for Teachers.
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Daily Comedy Brief · October 16th
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Tarot Cards for Teachers
First up, The Tower suggests that while you might have a mountain of mandated curriculum materials, you’ll expertly navigate them when the district comes to check in. You’ll claim you’re using them all, even if “America: Let’s Only Say Hooray!” feels like a questionable choice.
Then there’s The Hierophant, where you’ll generously pass on your trusty paper cutter to a new teacher, demonstrating its quirks like a magician revealing a secret. The Fool brings a lighter note; you’ll jump at any chance to hand out glitter, because what’s a classroom without a little chaos?
On Friday nights, The Hermit card hits home as you find solace in broccoli and garlic sauce while binge-watching The Pitt, feeling a kinship with Dr. Robby’s bathroom escapades. The Wheel of Fortune has you questioning your health, contemplating whether you’ve got strep or just need a nap.
Temperance reminds you to breathe through the chaos, especially when schedules shift unexpectedly. The Devil card highlights the irony of your first graders taking tests on devices that can’t seem to connect to the internet—classic.
Strength shows you sweating it out while making ice cream by hand, a labor of love for your students’ joy, even as custodians wonder if you need a hand. Finally, Judgment has you reflecting on your teaching career, balancing the challenges with the satisfaction of contributing to your community, while Justice brings a snow day announcement—no remote learning, just a sweet break.
Sweaty Youth Soccer Team Stinking Up Entire Red Robin
A youth soccer team in Columbus turned a Red Robin into their personal playground after a morning tournament, leaving diners gasping for fresh air. Patrons reported a mix of sweat, grass, and the unmistakable aroma of damp polyester wafting through the restaurant. Kids were climbing over seats, tossing fries, and creating chaos while their parents sat at a safe distance, enjoying beers and ignoring the ruckus. One diner lamented the loss of her bottomless fries, unable to enjoy them amid the overpowering “little-boy musk.” Meanwhile, a father made a half-hearted attempt to rein in the chaos before retreating back to his drink.
Weird Family Settles Disputes Calmly, Respectfully
In St. Louis, a family at a local bistro is raising eyebrows for their bizarrely calm approach to settling disputes. Instead of the usual chaos, they took turns speaking, listened to each other, and even apologized. Observers were left puzzled, expecting at least a little drama—maybe a dad yelling or kids hurling insults. But no, they maintained an unsettling level of respect and even ended with a group hug. It’s the kind of behavior that makes you question if you’ve wandered into an alternate universe. And just when you think it can’t get weirder, the dad reportedly drove them all off a bridge afterward.