I watched a Libra order a salad last week. It took nineteen minutes and at the end of it the waiter thanked her, and I mean sincerely thanked her, like she had pulled his family from a river. The salad arrived and it was correct in a way that salads are not usually correct. Everyone remembers the nineteen minutes and forgets the thanking, which is the entire Libra story in one lunch.
Say the word Libra and you get the same woman every time, a woman who can’t commit to a couch or a man, who agrees with whoever spoke last, basically a wind chime in a dress.
Serena Williams is a Libra and Serena Williams has never hesitated in her life, she decides mid-air. Cardi B is a Libra and Cardi B has committed harder to a single sentence than most people commit to a marriage. So either the stereotype is wrong or the moon is up there doing something, and I looked into the moon.
A Libra sun is half the woman and the moon finishes her. Depending on which moon she got, you are dealing with one of four completely different creatures, and I have met all four and named all four: the Confessor, the Architect, the Prosecutor, and the Switchboard. Each one is the best in the zodiac at something, and one of them has known your secrets since 2015.
Behind the paywall you find out which one you have, which one you are, and what was actually happening during those nineteen minutes.
But first, the salad, because I want this rumor dead. She decided the minute she sat down.
